Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Homework sucks big hairy horse balls

I think that homework is going to be my undoing. My kid is in the 3rd grade, and half the time I don't even UNDERSTAND the assignment - never mind know the right answer.

Directions are vague at best. And - BONUS - according to my son the teacher many times tells them they can do it a different way.....so even following the instructions to the letter does not mean it will be done correctly. That is, if I can understand the instructions, which as I mentioned, I frequently cannot.

AND if I manage to understand the directions, and come up with an answer that makes sense, I certainly won't be able to explain it to my son.

The whole thing is a fucking DEBACLE (I LOVE that word) and almost every night I end up shouting about homework. Third Grade Homework. By the time this kid gets to middle school I'm gonna be in a straight jacket drooling on myself.

Homework sucks and I hate it and I always have and I always will.

The difference is, now I can write notes to the teacher. In the future, I may be sending notes that read something like this: "Max did the work the way I TOLD HIM TO and if it's wrong it's not his fault so please don't mark him down because of it."

And things like "This is the lamest book ever, and there is no way to outline a problem and solution in a chapter that covers 3 pages - with illustrations and large print. And trying to do so ended in tears. Family-wide tears. I hope you're happy."

And I also like to point out that "We stayed out late and Max didn't have time to finish his homeowrk, so we'll catch up tomorrow."

In case it appears that I am downplaying the importance of homework, I am NOT. I get the point of homework, and I understand it's importance. But I think homework is something my child should be able to do INDEPENDENTLY to show that he understands what he has been taught.

Since the only thing my son handles independently is wiping his ass (and even that is far from a A+ situation, if you know what I'm saying) we still have a long way to go.

Which is where we get to the real heart of the matter. The purpose for this post. The motivation behind my tirade.

I need more wine.

3 comments:

sue said...

Oh Vanessa I so feel your pain, I despise homework with passion! Glad to hear I am not the only one!!

booshy said...

Wine makes everything better.

Denakisland said...

So, I'm just seeing this and take what I say with a grain of salt or whatever... but I don't believe in homework for kids under the 5th grade UNLESS they need extra help! I mean, geez, schools have my kids for 6 or more hours a day and I get them for what, maybe 4-5 by the time everyone is home from school and dinner doesn't take 2 hours to cook. So I banned it :) Yup, told the teachers that unless they needed extra work that there would be none done in Denakisland. You would think the teachers would get pissy about it, but not so much! Now, I did wonder if this was going to bite me in the ass 5 or 6 years later but guess what? Now I have one in high school with a 3.75 GPA and one in middle school with a 4.0 GPA and I know I did the right thing! (The high schooler would have a 4.0 if Spanish didn't require so much homework. But I give the teacher shit all the time about me "helping" with homework because I DON'T SPEAK SPANISH! So I wouldn't know if he was practicing verbs or swearing at me. Wait... I do know THOSE Spanish words!)