Thursday, May 21, 2009

Why yes, as a matter of fact, that WAS me in the lobster robe and no pants, dropping my son off at school.

This morning, as I do every morning, I drove my son to school wearing a bathrobe and flipflops.

I was operating under the assumption that no one would notice, or care.

I was wrong about noticing, and while I don't think she really *cared* per se, the chick in the green Escort found it endlessly amusing. I noticed her jaw drop as I made a left hand turn in front of her, and I almost wanted to stop in the middle of the intersection and say "Honey, before I had kids, I thought the same damn thing. I mean, really, who would wear a robe to drive her kid to school."

I would have had that chat, except that getting out of an SUV in a robe with no pants is, shall we say, indelicate, and I just didn't need to have a Paris/Lindsey/Britney moment right in the middle of town.

Plus I hadn't brushed my teeth. Or my hair.

So I kept on keeping on.

And after I made the decision to stay in my car, it suddenly occurred to me.

For The Love Of God, what if my car breaks down or I get pulled over or have an accident or something in the 3 blocks I drive to the elementary school? I can tell you right now, if a cop pulled me over, and saw me in my usual 7:15am getup, he would TOTALLY call for backup, and make me get out of the car, and really SAVOR the opportunity to personally humiliate a stupid haole in her LOBSTER BATHROBE who can't drive 3 blocks without breaking the law.

So, from now on I fully intend to both A. Put on Pants (under my robe) and B. Brush my Teeth before driving Max to school. You know, just in case.

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