Thursday, April 1, 2010

Well, I guess that's one way to make money in this economy

Max has his eye on a new Lego set. I told him he was going to have to save his money.

So in an effort to make some quick money, he pulled 3 teeth out of his mouth in two days.

You gotta admire his drive, man. That kid really wants those fucking Legos.

When he pulled out the first tooth, the tooth fairy didn't arrive for a few days - he was delayed. He was in Hana, mamping* for the weekend.

(*mamping = man camping, which is what my husband was doing when the first extraction occured. Mamping involves men and beer and fishing and setting fire to things including the grill and the surrounding area, and some jumping from impossibly dangerous vantage points into some very questionable swimming conditions, usually involving jagged rock and riptides.)

Max was very understanding, he knew that at some point, the tooth fairy would arrive and pay up. In the meantime, he even helped me collect all of the post-extraction bloody tissues that were in the wastebasket and on his bedside table. That extraction went down like the Little Shop of Horrors, evidently.

But this time, two teeth came out, with significantly less trauma. And we were on it, since the tooth fairy was present and accounted for. We snuck in and stuffed 2 wadded up dollar bills in his tooth box, and took the two teeth. When I got to the kitchen, I opened my hand to examine these last vestiges of his babyhood. One pearly white tooth, and one.......small black lego. That little bastard.

So I went back into the room with my flashlight, trying to locate the other tooth. I found it, eventually, just as beautifully pearly white as the other one, and I have to admit, as I stood there in his bedroom clutching his tiny baby tooth and looking at the very un-baby-like kid in the bed, I felt a little sad.

My first baby is growing up so fast. And extracting his own teeth for financial gain is just the beginning.
Soon, he'll be extracting his little sister's teeth too. I caught him pinning her down on the sofa yesterday, wiggling her very first loose tooth with a gleam in his eye.

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