Even though both kids have had TB tests we have to do them again to start this new school. Or at least, there seems to be confusion about whether we need to do it or not, so I made an appointment and we are going down to the clinic today. Hopefully, we can skip the whole test and get certificates showing that they already HAD a TB test, and that will be good enough.
But I am prepared for the worst.
Lucy has this issue with shots. She's not scared, she doesn't scream and fight and kick and have to be restrained.
It is way worse then that.
She looks at me, through the tears, as though I am sending her to the executioner. Her eyes say "I thought you were supposed to protect me" and she slowly lifts her arm obediently for the nurse.
It's like fucking Sophie's Choice every time she needs a shot.
She does cry, and squirm, and as the alcohol is swabbed on her arm she begs for a reprieve...but I can deal with all of that. What I CANNOT deal with is the guilt. And then the days that follow the shot, when she refuses to remove the bandaid, because then she won't be able to remember where the shot was, and what's the fun of THAT really?
Sometimes I hate being the grown up.
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