Thursday, June 17, 2010

A bar crawl that did not end up with me falling down? Most Excellent.

I have mentioned this before, and I am not sure if it is a universal truth, but when I go home to my mother's I regress. I find myself repeating familiar behaviors, reminicent of my 20 year old self.

My 20 year old self had some self-esteem issues, a broken heart, and a bit of a drinking problem.

I was living at home, working in a bar, staying up late and sleeping in. I fall right back in to the same schedule (without the work commitments) as soon as I put down my suitcase. In addition to getting all of my laundry done for me, and having all of my food prepared for me, I also always get in the car to find a full tank of gas. Excellent. So last night, I got in my mom's car, and started driving. I picked up my best friend's husband, who is also here with the kids and without a spouse, and who ALSO left his kids with grandma, and we began. The big difference between the 20 year old me and the grown-up me, is that I pace myself. Slow and steady might not win the race, but it may keep me from throwing up in the bushes. We went from bar to bar, cheerfully having a beer at every stop except for one very misguided decision to have a mango mojito. (And VOILA - bushes.) We watched volleyball at one bar, and at another neighborhood dive a nice old man told me that he would hit on me, except that I was eating onion rings and for him THAT was a deal breaker. I didn't tell him that I would have cut him off long before the onions would be an issue, instead I solemnly informed him that I would make better choices the next time we sat together at a bar. He considered that for a moment, and then offered to hold his breath. "I only need about 3 minutes" he explained.

And that was our cue to leave.

When I walked in the door to my mother's house at 1am, she was waiting up. Just like old times. I gave her the rundown of where I had been, and what I had to drink, and which bush would need to be hosed off in the morning. She supervised me as I took the kids to the bathroom and tried to get into bed without falling over. Because usually, I totally fall over.

An interesting note - not only did I not get carded once, not even ONE TIME, but my friend's husband? Totally did.
Just call me Mrs Robinson.

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