Tuesday, December 3, 2013

It's 3rd grade, not a Renaissance Faire. But still, there will be turkey legs in their lunch box SO HELP ME.

Last night, Max announced that he "loved" fruitcake, and ate half of one with gusto, while the rest of us watched in horror. To be fair, he's 13 and will eat almost anything that is not completely covered in mold. Fruitcake is no big deal. Except it totally is.

About 3 slices in, he paused. "Does fruitcake have an expiration date?" he inquired as he chewed slowly, moving the cake around in his mouth.

Sam reached for the box and began to scan it.

"Is fruitcake even edible?" Lucy was alarmed by the red and green bits.

"Yup." Max said, as he reached for another slice. "I'm eating it right now."

"I'm reading the directions." Sam announced. "Hang on."

"Max, do you have any idea how many things you have eaten that were not food? You eating something is definitely not the gold standard for determining if something is edible or not." I was standing in front of the open refrigerator, rearranging items in a desperate attempt to fit another turkey in there.

We are in the midst of eating Thanksgiving leftovers. Well, not so much leftovers, just the three fruitcakes we received as (gag?) (No. Really. GAG.) gifts and the four free turkeys I collected from our local grocery store last week.

See, at our grocery, every time you shop you earn points. And when you get 200 points you get a certificate. And each certificate can be redeemed for a turkey the week before Thanksgiving. There is a limit of one per day, so every morning I would go to the grocery store and then drive the turkey to a friend's house and leave it in their fridge.

I had 4 certificates, thus I had 4 turkeys to consume in short order. 2 were squared away on Thanksgiving Day. One we ate a few days before Thanksgiving as a practice round, and we roasted the fourth and final turkey last night.

This is a lot of turkey.

And because we have so much fucking turkey (when you are talking about 65 pounds of turkey, it is definitely fucking turkey, as opposed to regular old amounts of turkey) I am running out of ideas. We have had turkey soup, turkey enchiladas, turkey potpie, turkey tetrazzini, turkey quesadillas, turkey sandwiches, and turkey chili. I still have about 10 pounds of turkey to get through, so I am getting a little desperate.

Which is why the kids are taking turkey legs for lunch tomorrow. Please don't tell them. It's a surprise.

I am slowly adding recipes to What's Mommy Doing so feel free to head over there if you, too have a turkey in your fridge that is starting to smell funny.

1 comment:

Nancy R said...

You could freeze some.