I would write more about this, but he is busily digging up the garden and I really need to save my cilantro.
So I have to go.
In summary: Get a fish. Man's best friend MY ASS. Please note that in addition to the cargo area carpet, he also ate the seatbelt. And while he did that? He was SITTING ON A BONE. From fucking WHOLE FOODS. And several other chew toys. And we were on a car ride. And the back window was open. And it was a beautiful sunny day. And instead of hanging his head out the window and enjoying it, HE ATE MY CAR.
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