Tonight was roller derby practice number 2. I tried to keep up with the squad, and tried not to fall down. Reasonable goals, but a stretch, apparently. Because not only did I get lapped throughout the night (in my estimation, they were skating at least TWICE as fast as I was) but I also managed to fall down in spectacular fashion, completely unprovoked, totally on my own. No one bumped me or cut me off or anything.
I Just Fell Down.
And now it appears that I may or may not have broken a bone or three in my left hand (have I mentioned I'm left handed? I'm left handed). This is a very unfortunate turn of events for several reasons.
First, what asshole starts breaking bones on her second derby practice, without any physical contact of any kind? (Other then the contact of my left hand and the concrete - followed quickly by 2 knees, elbows and eventually my ass.)
Me. I'm that asshole.
Plus, having a broken hand would make it very difficult to bartend and wait tables, so let's just pretend that I never said that.
My hand is fine. I'm fine. Ouch. Sweet Jeebus this really does hurt. Shaking it off..........
OK, so now I am home clutching an ice pack and bitching about what a pussy I am and how they are probably going to just throw me off the team because I suck so hard. The only thing that is going to cheer me up is an anti-inflammatory and a beer. They are on deck and waiting for me to shower - and grow a pair. I am really going to have to toughen up if I am going to do this thing.
Let's reconnect tomorrow, for a status update....and maybe a trip to the clinic for an x-ray! They have good burgers at the clinic, so the trip wouldn't be a total loss, plus the kids would get stickers and OOOOhhhhh maybe I'll get a CAST ! Dude, that would be AWESOME. I wonder if they have pink.............hey, where's my beer? Wait, was that an ibuprofen, or a vicodin? Hm. Ah well, whatever.
5 hours ago