Lock up your husbands - and your wives - because I am (apparently) HOTT - with 2 t's

Either I am releasing some MAD pheramones, or there was a press release telling people to make amends because I have only weeks to live.

Between the flower arrangements, phone calls, hand-written notes on pretty little notecards, and emails, I am a very hot commodity. People are DESPERATE to confess, make amends, reconnect, and repair relations with me this week.
Seriously.
Who knew.

And what I want to know is "What the fuck, people ?"

It must be my new bangs.

I knew getting bangs would totally change my life. I just KNEW IT.

Don't try this at home, people. It's powerful stuff.