The wheels on the bus go round and round and LOOK OUT FOR THAT TRUCK

We are going on a field trip today.

I have to ride on a bus with 45 pre-schoolers. Again.

Hold me.

It's not just being on a bus with ALL OF THOSE KIDS for almost 2 hours.

It's being ON A BUS.

Were you with me last January when I did this?

And also this ?

So let's just say I HAVE SOME ISSUES that may or may not (hah ! of course they are) be some variety of PTSD. And as a result, I have a very difficult time being a passenger. I flinch and twitch and clutch my seat and try not to look and basically just wait for the impending crash. Because of course, it's gonna happen. Someday.

In an effort to get through this, to confront my very real fears about riding in a vehicle that I am not in control of, and especially one in which I cannot see the road ahead of me, I am going to ride on that bus this morning. I am going to smile and be totally pleasant. I am not going to cry - not even a whimper. I promise to be calm, cool, and collected.

I will not promise that there will only be coffee in my coffee cup.